Your Calendar Isn’t the Problem: What Your Schedule Says About Your Life
I have to laugh at the irony. Every single time I write or teach about time management, my own ability to manage time effectively falls apart. Case in point: as I sit here writing this blog, I feel completely underwater. Too much to do. Too few hours to do it. And here we are: the topic for this week’s blog is time and calendars. Right on schedule.
I’ll just name it right now: I am not perfect at time management. (Spoiler alert—no one is.) There is no perfect. There’s just practice. Some days or weeks are smoother than others, but we’re all just doing our best.
And maybe that’s the point. The calendar itself isn’t the problem. It’s just a reflection. A mirror of what we’ve said yes to, how we’re choosing (or not choosing) to spend our time, and what matters most to us. If we’re paying attention, it can tell us a lot.
What Your Calendar Says About You
Here’s the truth: our calendars are more than logistics. They reveal our values, our needs, and our priorities.
Sometimes the reflection is encouraging: we see evidence of the people and commitments that matter most to us. Other times it’s a wake-up call: what we say we value and what our schedule reflects don’t always line up.
I know this in my own life. Productivity is a core need for me—it’s how I’m wired—and my calendar often reveals my tendency to overcommit. If there’s space, I fill it. If there’s a request, I try to honor it. If there’s a project, I want to get it done. That drive to produce can be good, but it can also push me to add more than I can realistically manage.
One of my clients put it another way. She has a wealth of relationship-building strengths and she once described herself as “addicted to people.” Her calendar shows it: coffee dates, meetings, check-ins, volunteer commitments, late-night conversations. She puts everyone else’s needs and requests first, often to the neglect of her own. For her, the calendar was a mirror that revealed not just generosity but also a pattern of depletion.
What about you? If you looked at your calendar as a mirror, what would it reflect back?
Common Missteps with Time
We all have ways we misuse or misunderstand our calendars.
We say yes out of guilt, fear, or people-pleasing instead of genuine desire or calling.
We treat the calendar like a battleground—cramming in commitments, double-booking ourselves, constantly rearranging.
We wear busyness like a badge of honor, as if it’s proof of our worth.
And here’s another one I know all too well: being a slave to the calendar.
I’m big on honoring commitments. If it’s on my calendar, I will show up. Come heck or high water, I will do the thing. And in many ways, that’s commendable. We like people who keep their word.
But here’s the downside. Sometimes I prioritize “the thing on the calendar” over my own needs—without weighing the true importance of that appointment. Earlier today was a perfect example. I was freaking out because tomorrow is booked solid with meetings and appointments—leaving me no time to make headway on a monster to-do list.
Then I actually stopped and looked more deeply at the day. Two of the morning meetings were “nice to do” but not essential. And honestly, no one would be let down if I didn’t show up. I realized the better decision was to cut those appointments and invest the time in the tasks at hand.
Why? Not because I’m giving in to workaholism or self-centeredness. But because when I look ahead to the weekend, I want to spend that long weekend with my family—without working. THAT is my bigger yes. And knowing that priority helped me exercise what Stephen Covey calls “integrity in the moment of choice.”
That phrase has stuck with me. Integrity in the moment of choice. It’s not about abandoning commitments carelessly—it’s about making decisions that align with the bigger yes, not just the next yes.
Listening to What Your Calendar Is Telling You
Instead of fighting with our calendars—or letting them boss us around—what if we used them as a tool for reflection?
The next time you glance at your week, ask:
What does my calendar say about what I value?
What does it say about how I see myself?
Where are my true needs showing up (or not showing up at all)?
It’s not about judgment or guilt. It’s about curiosity. Our calendars are mirrors. If we listen closely, they can reveal where we’re aligned—and where something’s out of sync.
A Faithful Reframe: From Human Doing to Human Being
Here’s the bigger picture: God did not design us to be slaves to our schedules. From the very beginning, God created rhythms of work and rest. Jesus modeled withdrawing to pray, taking time for presence, pausing for people.
When my calendar feels overwhelming, I’ve been reminding myself of this: I’m not just a worker. I’m not only a producer, a leader, or a helper. I’m a whole person, created in God’s image—not a human doing, but a human being.
Lately, I’ve been calling myself back to that truth. Yes, work matters, but so do the other parts of me. My family. My friendships. My health. My joy. My faith. My creativity. These are not “extras” to squeeze in if time allows. They are what help make me whole—and holy. They shape me into the fullness of the person God created me to be.
And one more confession: when my schedule is too full, I start cutting out quiet time with God. I tell myself I can “pray as I go”—and yes, God is with me in the going. But the reality is, if too many days go by without stopping, sitting, reflecting, and praying in the morning, things go sideways for me. My stress gets higher, my energy is thinner, and my sense of direction gets fuzzy. My calendar reveals that truth every single time.
A Mini Reflection Exercise
Want to try this for yourself? Here’s a simple way to listen to your calendar:
Pull out last week’s calendar.
With a pen in hand, circle the times when you felt most alive.
Put a star next to the times you felt most drained.
Notice what’s missing—the things you longed for but didn’t make it onto the page.
Then ask yourself: what is this mirror revealing? What small shift might help my calendar reflect not just the demands around me, but the priorities within me?
Calendars Shape Our Rhythms, Rhythms Shape Our Lives
The truth is, our calendars don’t just reflect our lives—they shape them. The rhythms we live by become the patterns that form our days, our seasons, and ultimately, our lives.
Small tweaks can make a difference, but deeper shifts often require clarity, courage, and support. That’s the work I love most: helping women step out of overwhelm and into rhythms that align with their true selves, their faith, and their bigger yes.
Your Invitation: Reset Your Rhythm This Fall
If your calendar feels like it’s running you instead of serving you, I want to invite you to Reset Your Rhythm: 3 Days to Realign with What Matters Most.
It’s a free, live challenge where we’ll pause before the fall gets too full, reflect on what your calendar is really saying, and begin making gentle but real changes. In just 3 days, you’ll get space, tools, and encouragement to reclaim your rhythm and re-center on what matters most.
Because your calendar isn’t the problem. But it is telling you something. The question is: are you ready to listen—and live into your bigger yes?
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